Saturday, June 29, 2013

When is it okay to tell an acquaintance they can't stare at my boobs?

No, really.

In a perfect world, it would be okay to tell them the very first time. In a perfect world I could yell back at cat-callers (or not get cat-called at all...also can someone write an article someday about the historical use of "cat" and "pussy" for bits, because I would absolutely read that) without being kind of concerned for my safety. In a perfect world, it wouldn't matter what women wore, because we never, ever, ever deserve it. *rant over*

In a perfect world, I would also get paid to drink wine, travel the world, and pin things on Pinterest all day too.

So I have this acquaintance, who I have to see professionally, on a relatively regular basis, cannot seem to look me in the eyes. They stare at my chest whether I'm in a tank top or a t-shirt or a dress or a coat - doesn't matter.

At first, I thought maybe I had something on myself. I am blessed in the boobs department, and yeah, I've absolutely dripped ranch on my boob before and not noticed until my friends mocked me (thanks y'all...). I'm a hot mess. It's not unrealistic to assume I have something out of place.


All the time.

No ranch.

No crumbs.

No cat hair.

Just boobs.

I've tried everything short of saying don't look at my boobs. The "head bob down to wear this person looks" move. The "book in front of the chest" move. Even the "Oh...I gotta go" move, which just results in an awkward goodbye wave to the ladies, not me.

This person is not from this country, but I'm pretty sure no matter where you're from, you gotta look a girl in the eyes on occasion.

My career isn't dependent on them, but I work in a public setting and need to be at least cordial to everyone.

So when is the appropriate time?

A year?
A month?
A day?
2 years?
Whenever the hell I feel like it, ladylike demure-ing be damned?

Reason #672 why having boobs is hard, and #439 why being a woman is way more complicated than it should be/than most men recognize.

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Lots happening in the world - and a lipstick review!

So there's been a lot going on the past few days.

SCOTUS, in particular, has been making some waves. While the VRA shenanigans are ridiculous, I'm so happy that DOMA and Prop 8 have basically been struck down. It's not a perfect ruling, and there's still a lot of work to be done, but equality got a huge boost yesterday.

Senator Wendy Davis from Texas (and all the other senators who helped out) is awesome, and I'm so proud of the protesters who helped kill SB5. Of course Rick Perry is going to call another session, but I'd like to think that this is a clear sign of what the people actually want.

So the last few days have been kind of heavy. Beyond all that, I'm sick (still), and stressed out (still), and broke (damn you grad school!).

What makes everyone feel better? What raises everyone's spirits? What compliments equality and revolution perfectly?


*Image via Sephora.

This pink lipstick in particular.

It's BareMinerals "Risk it All," and, despite being a red lipstick devotee, I love it.

I talked about my adventures in lip gloss buying in Utah a few days ago, and this was part of that same trip. I even posted a pic of this lipstick. But, other than trying it on in the City Creek Mall Sephora, I hadn't really worn it. 

I'm an impulse shopper.

But then. 


I wore it. 

And my lord...I might be a pink lipstick convert. 

This isn't even pink. This is "hot pink" according to Sephora. It's "energetic magenta" on the BareMinerals site. It's not bubblegum, so I don't look 12 or like I'm in an 80's music video (although, side note, I will hella rock a side ponytail on occasion, and just bought a neon green mini skirt, so I might actually live in an 80's music video normally...). It's not too orange, it's just a really good, deep shade of pink. 

Here it is on:

Even with no sleep, 12 hour days reading essays, and lots and lots of time spent shopping and walking, I still think the color makes me look way more awake and...alive...than I really was. (And yes, there is a filter on this, but the lip color is the same. I just filtered out the awful things fluorescent lights do to people.)

Here's in my kitchen, yesterday, no filter:

*Kirby's kid is in 90% of my selfies in the kitchen, although I'm really confused about why everything looks reversed here. Anyone who's been in my kitchen knows that's not the order things are in. I'm either on a lot of drugs or way worse at spatial reasoning/math than I thought...

Even with pulled back hair and a Packers shirt (woohoo!) this lipstick still manages to look good. 

Could I have found the ultimate, wear with anything, lipstick? 

Here are two pics from the excellent and informative blogger Shelbey

Beyond the color, the texture is great. It's not super glossy (like the other lipstick I wear all the time, Makeup Forever's Aqua Rouge in Iconic Red) but it's glossy enough that it doesn't feel dry and flaky. And it lasts FOREVER. Like next day, after I've eaten, drank, brushed my teeth, tossed and turned, taken a shower...still there. 

The only downside is the tube. I like that the top part won't just come off, but the button and slide situation makes it even more likely that I'm going to drop it either opening or closing the lipstick. And at a well-worth-it $18 a pop, I really don't want to do that. 

Has anyone tried any of the other colors? I'm thinking about trying the nude in the fall, and maybe trying their red color when I run out of my others (or just because I'm an addict...). 

So, enjoy the news, keep fighting for love and equality, and, while you're at it, look amazing/gift someone the gift of looking amazing. Because you really can't go wrong with pink. 

*BareMinerals, Sephora, Makeup Forever, and anyone else I mention on here have no idea who I am. I just like a captive audience to talk about things I think are pretty. :)

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Eyeshadow Review - Naked Basics Palette by Urban Decay

I don't claim to have any training in how to apply makeup (unless you can get degrees from Pinterest), but I do think I look okay most days. I'm still not feeling great, but I have an intense love for my everyday eyeshadow, the Naked Basics Palette by Urban Decay, and who doesn't feel better when they talk about makeup!?*

So this palette is basically a scaled down version of this one (both images from - I have a problem...):

And this one, the original:

I like both of these, but there are some downsides. First, they're each $50. If you know you love the colors, and you'll use all of them, that's a great bargain. If you don't think you'll ever wear that shimmery blue, or you don't know if you like the consistency, or you have allergies and aren't sure about Urban Decay, then it's a little pricey. Second, I am not a fan of glittery eyeshadows for every day wear. For special occasions, for fun nights out, sure, but not for 8 am in the office. Which is where this little problem-solving beauty comes in:

The Naked Basics palette runs about $27 at most retailers (Ulta, Sephora, etc.). It has 6 shades, a good sized mirror, and what seems, after 6 months and a ton of trips and general clumsiness, to be a really good and sturdy case.

The colors are:

Venus - A very lightly shimmery white that I tend to use in the inside corners of my eyes and, on occasion, as a highlighter under my eyebrows.
Foxy - A yellowish color that I don't use often by itself, but that I blend with the other colors sometimes, especially in the summer.
Walk of Shame (W.O.S.) - A great, light beige neutral. Good highlighter, especially when you don't want any shimmer.
Naked 2 - This color is what I use everyday first. It's just good for getting my eyelids the same color before I put anything else on, and, even when I don't wear anything else, this gives me a little color.
Faint - A darker brown color that I use on the crease of my lids usually. Mixed with the Foxy it's really pretty and a nice subtle smokey color.
Crave - BLACK black. Like, really black. It's nice and matte though, so sometimes I make a gray shadow with it and Venus or Foxy, and sometimes I actually put it really close to my eyelashes and do a kind of "faux liner" move with it. 

(I was going to post pictures of me wearing it, but taking a picture of your own eye is really hard. If you know me in real life, you've seen me wear it every day.)

I can toss this in my purse, it's not too expensive, it's easy to come up with color combinations, and it cuts out the need for any more products that I would have to take the time to apply or carry around with me. 

My cousin was concerned that the cakes would crack or break up, but I've thrown this in my purse, in a weekender bag, in multiple makeup bags, and on my vanity, and I've taken it to 4 different countries and several states, both in cars and planes, and it's been fine. That's not saying they won't break, but I haven't had it happen yet. :)

*Urban Decay doesn't pay me, they have no idea who I am, and I didn't get this palette for free or a reduced price. I just like talking about pretty stuff.

Monday, June 24, 2013

Ill - so here's some incredibly rational (and thus probably off-putting) political commentary...

So I'm super sick. I have a sinus infection and tonsillitis, and I pretty much feel like I'm on death's door. 

In lieu of our regularly schedule programming, I present you with this awesomeness from this tumblr

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Back in Memphis - but first, a Utah review!

I'm back!

I survived both flights, no humidity, 100 degree heat, 230,000 AP World History essays, being in a room with 500 other people all week, and a week of cafeteria food, so I'm calling it a win.

While I was there I also:

-Got off the plane so rested. Whatever my mom gave me to calm me down before my flight sort of made me hear colors. But I wasn't scared so I guess it worked.

-Ate at Dairy Delight with my cousin. It's this tiny restaurant in Tooele that my aunt loved, and I always get the same thing: Ranch Burger (two patties, american cheese, ranch, and pickles), fries, and fry sauce. If you don't know what fry sauce is, I'm sorry for you and your sad life. Get thee to the internet!

-Hung out with my awesome cousin, her husband, my other great cousin, my uncle, and the rest of my family. Which was super fun. Also my cousin Sam has a mattress topper that I think is made of unicorn hair. It was glorious.

-Ate at Cheesecake Factory. I know it's a chain, and I try to eat local when I can, but it's so good, and people who work at chains need customers too.

-Ate at a Mimi's Cafe for the first time since I worked there briefly in 2007. I don't miss working there, but I forgot how good their food was.

-Went to a billion malls. And discovered that Bare Escentuals has a physical store. And bought way too many lip glosses. I got this set, which I absolutely love:

And this single, which is a good red for summer, since lipsticks tend to get kind of heavy:

-We also went to Sephora with my cousin Sam's friend Jodi. Where I bought this (anyone seeing an obsessive trend here?): 

It's Bare Minerals Marvelous Moxie lipstick in "Risk it All." It's SUPER pink, but it look really great on. Now I have no more money. 

-Went to a Johnny Rockets, which is like a classier Steak 'n Shake. 

-Went to Nordstrom. Which I generally find overpriced. But we had fun. We had the nicest girl at the makeup counter, where Jodi was trying to find some blush. I told her that I use Nars Orgasm, "The Multiple" Stick. Which sounds dirty all on it's own. But it's a beautiful blush that I use all year.

Trying to be helpful, the girl at the counter gave Jodi this to take home and try:

Yeah, that devolved really fast. Many hours later, and in front of people, Jodi asked me whether I used it on my face directly or I put it on my hands first. You can guess where that went. 

-I was also kind of that yokel cousin who needed to paint her nails, so I did it (two coats even) with the Nars "Madness" tester. Which I will buy when I get money again: 

-On Thursday, I went out with my friend Erin for her birthday to this amazing sushi place we went to last year, Happy Sumo. Literally the best sushi I've ever had. I had the Surf and Turf (steak, tempura shrimp, all of it tempura fried) and the Bacon Crunch Roll (tempura shrimp, green onion, avocado, all rolled in bacon and tempura bits with a maple dipping sauce). I ate all the sushi (and the edamame, and the lettuce rolls, and the tempura peppers...): 

-We spent a lot of time in the hot tub. Because sitting in a hot tub is the exact opposite of sitting in a crowded room eating too much and reading mind numbing amounts of essays. 

-Erin and I went to the chalk art festival at the Gateway Mall:

-I had a great view from my hotel: 

-And drank a lot of Slurpees (I love 7-Eleven):

-And walked around Temple Square. I'm not a Mormom, but I think it is a beautiful place:

Where we saw two separate couples taking wedding photos, but I tried not to be a super creeper.

-Saw Man of Steel. Good. Not life changing, not genre changing, but good. And Henry Cavill is very pretty.

-And then, after a fun day with my cousin and a night out with my friend Bryan at The Bayou (tagline: Welcome to Beervana - so true...), I went to the airport, had a Provo Girl Pilsner, took another one of those amazing drugs, and flew home. 

When I got home, my roommate picked me up, the house didn't look like a frat house, and my cat was really happy to see me. Until I decided he needed a bath: 

So that was my last couple of weeks. I was actually about to leave my office when it started doing this outside: 

What you can't see is the wind going crazy. So I'm hanging tight for a minute. Going to see This is The End tonight, assuming I don't get blown away.